Down

I've been feeling kind of down lately. I'm not sure if it's because I haven't been able to get out much or stress from other areas in my life. My knee is healing well, I got the stitches out yesterday. I've gotten some other strengthening exercises from the physio to do as well.

Milo went back to the vet. Both his back paws are infected. Just a few weeks after they had cleared up :/. We must seem like pretty awful puppy parents. I think it might be a new food allergy developing, we will likely have to re-test.

I worked with some femo clay. I'll post pictures once I paint it.

Post-op....continues...

I'm doing alright. I was able to get around the apartment today with out a problem. Other than kneeling, I still can't kneel. Or squat. My knee is still inflamed, but it isn't painful. A bit achey. My back is actually starting to hurt more than anything, not being able to squat or kneel means I need to bend my back more to pick up things. So i've been having some back spasms, which is no fun.

On a lighter note, i've almost finished up one of my big projects for the semester. Yay for botany! I'm still behind in my notes, but I figure i'll do an hour or two a day and I should be able to make it up.

Milo has injured his back paws again :/.

Post-op Day 10

Not much to update on. My days have been pretty much the same. Still swollen, still bruised. I can walk around a bit better, stairs are still hard though.

Post-op Day 8 *WARNING*

*SURGICAL IMAGE WARNING* I'm going to post a picture of my knee post-op without the bandage.

I haven't updated lately because my days have been similar. Rest, ice, tell Milo to stop barking, sleep, repeat. I have been healing though, i've been able to put more weight on my leg each day. I used two crutches, then one crutch, now i'm hobbling around without anything at home but used my cane when I went to see the doctor. Speaking of my GP, they didn't even send her the report! She didn't even know I had surgery until I said "well, i'm here to get my bandages off...". Lol. And what a relief it was to get them off! Wanna see a picture?

Bruises and Stitches

It's pretty bad quality...but basically my knee is inflamed and brused everywhere. It doesn't hurt much though, the feeling is like it's bruised. Which it is. And like I can't bend it all the way. And a bit achey. But compared to sciatic pain, it's nothing! I'm not sure why i'm bruised farther down the leg, maybe the surgeon was leaning on it? I'll have to ask next week. The stitches are prickly. My wrists are also getting quite sore. Whether from being on the compy/phone, arthritis flaring, or from holding my self up on counters and crutches i'm not sure.

In other news, i've started the second book in the A Song of Ice and Fire series. I'm trying to catch up with the tv show (which is on season three, I think it would be around book three?) but it's slow going. I don't think I read as quickly on the computer as I do a physical book. Strange?

Post-op Day 4

I'm able to put more weight on my leg as time goes on, tomorrow I think i'll be able to walk with just one crutch. While my knee hasn't been more painful, it has felt more inflamed today. I've spent most of the day reading A Game of Thrones. I'll likely finish it off tomorrow. I really need to start working on my projects and tutorials >.>...

My leg with an icepack, 

the bandages are already starting to look ragged

The lovely easter basket and chocolate bunnies my MiL left us :)

You may notice that both the bunnies already have their ears eaten...

Post-op Day 3

It's been a long day. Bran, Milo, and I are house sitting for my MiL. This also includes watching after the adorable old shar pei MiL adopted, he's no trouble really but it's all extra work for Bran!

I've been extraordinarily tired today. I took a little nap this morning and i've just been resting most of the day (other than packing up a little and getting in and out of the car). Pain levels are ok, though the fibro pain is acting up a bit. I feel like my hips and shoulders are bruised, even though they aren't at all.

I've also started reading A Game of Thrones, it's following the series so far, but I like having all the extra details :).

Here is a pic of my leg, this time on a different couch!

Post-op Day 2

I was on my own today. Not my favorite. I'm feeling much more tired and ended up taking a three hour nap in the middle of the day. Though on a good note, I was able to take a shower (on my little stool) without getting the bandage wet. It's nice to have clean hair :). I've been putting a bit of weight on my leg now as well, I haven't had any endone today so I can see exactly how much pain i'm in. Keeping in mind i'm on slow release panadol, but it's pretty bearable.  I'll take some endone tonight to help with sleep but I should be able to go without it soon. Took the brace off today as well, honestly I think it was more cumbersome than helpful to begin with. My wrists and shoulders are sore though...Here are some pictures!

My leg without the brace, you can see crutches in the background

I kept water and ice packs in an insulated bag next to the couch, handy!

Milo keeping watch, he isn't impressed with my photography skills

Little stool with non-slip spots on it, handy for couch-side table and showering

Post-op Day 1

I am now 29 hours post op. How did it go? Quite well as far as I can tell! I didn't actually get the chance to talk to the surgeon again, only the rather cute resident doctor, but from what I gather it all went as expected. I have a big brace that i'm to wear until tomorrow afternoon (48 hours post-op) and lots of bandages i'm to leave on for a week, then see my GP and have her take them off. In two weeks I have the follow up with the surgeon (or maybe the resident again? Who knows..). 

Pain hasn't been too bad, i've been taking panadol osteo and the occasional endone. Which it is about time to take again. My throat is a bit sore from the tube they stick down it during the operation  but otherwise i'm pretty ok. I had to wheel and deal a bit to get to go home, the surgeon wanted me to stay overnight because he thought I would be dealing with intense pain. After working with the physios though they thought I could go home, and so I did! Just to let you know, it's really hard going up stairs using crutches! I can start putting a little bit of weight on my right leg tomorrow, though i'll likely still have to use crutches for a little while. 

My husband has been taking great care of me <3 he is so lovely :).

So here are some pictures I took over the past day, the leg pictures look really weird since they were taken from a laying down position >.> my feet look disproportionately small..

Name tag and the edge of my lovely hospital gown

My unstyled hair and scarf keeping me warm

 Ted covered left foot and right leg in brace + wrapping

 It took them a few times to get a suitable vein >.>

Leg today, with my tropical shorts :)

P.S. don't you love my sandal tan lines? XD

Pre-op Consultation

Tomorrow is surgery day! I had the pre-surgery consultation today, it seems like i'm likely to have to stay overnight :(. If I somehow get to be first in line for surgery, they may let me go home, but it's unlikely. So i've gotten a few books together and put a movie on my iphone, hopefully that'll get me through the wait (since they want me there at 6:30 am, despite that i'm not first in line) and to keep from being bored if I need to stay overnight. I'll keep all four of you that follow me up to date on how it goes ;).

Queenies Tea House

Today was the day! The day I celebrated my birthday with my family here in Oz :). Bran, my MiL, SiL and I went out to morning tea at Queenies. It was lovely to spend some time together, and once agin Queenies was top notch. My MiL and I both got regal high teas while SiL and Bran preferred bacon egg pies. There was even leftover treats that we took home and had for afternoon tea ;). Over all a lovely day. Tomorrow is the pre-op consultation where I will learn my fate. Not looking forward to it so much, but it must be done. I'll also try to get in and see my GP.

Dog Park Fun

Quiet day at home. Hip/back is still not awesome, but I was able to go for a good walk with Bran and Milo to the dog park. I love watching Milo run around and roll in the grass :) he made friends with a rather chatty dalmatian. We have my birthday high tea tomorrow with MiL and SiL.

Quiet Day of Rest

Quiet day at home. Hip/back pain is back up to a 5 :( probably need to up lyrica? I'm not sure if my GP will want that during recovery from the knee surgery though. Hopefully I can get in to see her. I've been choosing movies to watch during recovery as well :) hopefully Bran will like them or i'll be watching them on the compy.

Speaking of Bran, he had an interview yesterday that he wasn't too confidant about but the recruter e-mailed him saying it went really well! The office is a bit closer to us and apparently pretty casual. We'll see what comes of it :).

Herbs and the Future

I'm pretty boring today. I had a nice long conversation with my sisters and father back home, then went to class. 

Class was fun though, we were talking about teas vs infusions vs decoction and succus. Here is the difference; a tea is steeping a bit of dried or fresh herb in just boiled water for about three to five minutes, an infusion is steeping a medicinal amount of herbs in water (1:20 herb to water by weight) in boiled water for 10-30 minutes, and a decoction is boiling an herb for a set period of time. On the other hand, a succus is basically juicing an herb and adding alcohol as a preservative. So today we made an infusion of chamomile, a decoction of different spices (which was basically chai tea, mmmm ;) ) and two different succi, one garlic and one lemon. They are going to trial the succi next week when i'll be home recovering, but it's great stuff to learn about! Plus i'm not too sad about missing raw garlic mixed with alcohol thats been sitting around for a week ;). 

We also had a presentation by a representative from The Herbal Extract Company of Australia. We compared their herbal extracts vs the Mediherb extracts we use in class and in clinic. Keep in mind these are both top of the line medicinal herbal extracts, but I liked the Herbal Extract Company's more. They seemed to be closer to the herb and had less of an alcohol taste, but maybe that is just my preference. I hope to someday be able to make my own herbal extracts to use in my own practice :). 

Peanut Butter Pie and Broccoli Soup

Today I made something delicious. Any day I say that must be pretty good, right? My creation today is a delicious peanut butter pie, minus the crust as we had no cookies and I didn't feel like making a crust. I used the recipe here.

Peanut Butter Pie Minus Crust

It turned out lovely and creamy. I only made half the recipe and less of the chocolate topping as I only had a bit of chocolate, which is another reason why it is in ramekins. It is super quick to whip up too! I'll definitely be making this again :).

My husband Bran, on the other hand, made a delicious cheesy broccoli soup! I think this is the first soup he has made, and he did a great job :). The recipe is sort of a mash up of different recipes i've read, so it's sort of original? It makes a lot of soup <3 some for the freezer I think! I'll leave it here for anyone who is interested. 

Broccoli soup

1 large onion

2 cloves garlic

4 potatoes (5-6 small)

1 liter Stock

2 heads broccoli

2 cups shredded cheddar

1-2 cups Milk (cream, cream cheese, etc.)

Olive oil/butter 

Salt and pepper

Dice onion,  fry at the bottom of a 5 lt pot and until browned using butter or olive oil. Add garlic and stir until browned. C

hop up cleaned potatoes into 1 inch cubes, a

dd potatoes and stir for 30 seconds. Add stock, bring to a boil then cover and set on low heat.

Preheat oven to 150 C. Wash broccoli well. Chop up, including broccoli stems. Place on cookie sheet and toss with a bit of oil. Cook in oven until browned, about 20 minutes.

Add broccoli to soup once browned. Turn off burner. Add milk. Make sure soup is not too hot and add cheddar, mix until melted.

Blend with immersion blender until at the desired texture (or mash with potato masher and have it chunky). Add salt and pepper to taste.

This time Bran used some cream in place of some of the milk. It would also be good using cream cheese or sour cream, probably yogurt would be alright. You could use veggie stock and soy milk, ignoring the cheese, to make it vegan. Such variations! 

In other news, i'm nervous about the upcoming surgery. I'm not looking forward to the recovery mostly, but i'm so glad Bran was able to get a few days off with such short notice. Plus he has friday and monday off to celebrate good friday and easter (not that we celebrate either...maybe celebrate a late Mabon?), so there is some extra time that he'll be around to help me out. Mostly i'm concerned about stairs, as we live on the first floor. I'm pretty sure they have you on crutches for about the first five days, so I think i'll just have to take it nice and easy. 

My R hip has been a bit painful today, otherwise i'm alright. No mood swings. 

Good News and Annoying Symptoms

Good news everybody! I finally have my knee surgery date! It's in a week!? It's in a week from this morning. Someone else had to cancel and apparently I was the first person who was free to take their place. This is both good and bad news. Good because I really would like my knee to not be causing constant pain and going off track at random times. Bad because i'll likely miss a week of school (or more) and have to do painful physiotherapy for at least six weeks. But still...after that it should be all good!

The surgery i'm getting is called a lateral release. Thats where they go in with small incisions and a camera and snip some connective tissue that is too tight and pulling the kneecap off center. The connective tissue will heal and be less tight and the physiotherapy ensures your muscles help hold the kneecap in place. It's an outpatient procedure, so hopefully i'll be able to go home the same day.

I'm hoping over the week to stock up my freezer with some meals so Bran wont have to do all the cooking (and i'll have something to eat when he is at work and i'm recovering). I'm thinking easy things like soups, especially since we don't have much freezer room. Maybe some french toast...

In other news, annoying mood swings today. Had an anxiety attack, which was stopped with the help of some passion flower extract. Then after I got home from class my head felt achey and was getting symptoms similar to when I came off cymbalta. It might be because i'm titrating off of amitriptyline, if I recall it has a longer half life so maybe i'm only getting the discontinuation symptoms now?

Pain in hip was up a bit, maybe 3/4.

Blah.

Blah. Just feeling a bit blah. Pain is down though, so thats good! But just blah. Goodnight.

Quiet

Quiet day at home. Now much to update on. Pain is still down to a 2/3 so i'm a happy camper. I do feel like I look more bloated, but maybe thats just me... I've been tired today as well. So now i'm off to bed.

Haircut and Tea

I've had a great day! First, my pain levels are down to a 2-3, which is fantastic as i'm usually at at 5-6 and lately often a 7.

Second, I finally got my hair cut! The hair stylist was fantastic and a lovely person. I got my hair cut at The Ruby Room in Nundah, if anyone wants to know. They gave me coffee and a head massage as well as a fantastic cut. Plus she actually explained how to style my new haircut, which sometimes they neglect to do. So here is my new 'do:

Haircut <3

Third, I had a delicious afternoon tea at Queenies Tea House, which I will also be going to with Bran, SiL, and MiL next weekend for a high tea! They were also lovely, I had a wonderful sticky date pudding and some tea which I don't remember the name of but was also good!

I then (fourthly) went to my osteopath to get some work done, and everyone in the place complemented my new haircut :) it's always nice to get complements.

So at this point i'm lookin' good, nicely fed, and feeling good.

Now i'm having Red Rooster (it's a fast food place that serves chicken) and snuggling with my hubby :). Nice way to end a great day! I've fluffed up my hair a bit, and i'm so looking forward to playing with it and my new styling cream. 

Oh, and it's my birthday <3

Manufacturing Class and Lyrica

So this is my 366th post! That mean's i've written (all together) a year's worth of posts. Pretty exciting.

Anyway, Lyrica is pretty heavy duty. I woke up in a complete fog. It was like walking in a fun house most of the day. It cleared up later, around 2 pm, so I was able to attend class. This is at 75 mg twice daily mind you, so i'm starting out a bit heavier than others i've read about (who started at 50 mg once daily). I think i'll be alright though. As I said, I made it through class and tomorrow is a day off then the weekend so i'll have some time to adjust. I'm also titrating off amitriptyline, though I don't think the fogginess was from that.

In other news, I had a really great time at class! We were learning about herbal tablets and capsules. We actually made some tablets (although they are wet, and would need to be dried out) :D. It's amazing how easy they were to make, but granted we had medical grade herbs in class. If we were making it for clients we would need to be much more careful about measuring and whatnot. Still, it was fun :).

Pain level was down today, maybe only a 2 or 3. Whether that is due to lyrica or just a good day i'm not sure. I'm getting a hair cut tomorrow :) quite excited for it.

48 Hours Later

It's been a long 48 hours. Monday I was feeling pretty good, until the evening when my back hurt so much I had trouble sleeping and woke up a lot. Tuesday my back spasmed horribly, and more of my leg went numb (i've had a numb stripe since the microdiscectomy). ER, three crying fits, and a few hours later i'm sent home and told to see my gp and start some nerve pain meds. So thats what I do. I missed class again today (which I HATE doing) to see my gp (and have another crying fit >.>) and get a script for Lyrica.

I also got a script for sertraline. Because i'm not coping and my anxiety is up so high that i'm apparently crying infront of every health practitioner I come across. I'm not particularly proud of this...the crying or the sertraline...but I can't keep going like this, with either the pain or the emotions about the pain. I've used sertraline in the past with success, so i'm hoping it'll help carry me through this rough patch. 

So now i'm starting up a small dose of Lyrica and titrating down the amitriptyline before adding sertraline in 8 days or so. It isn't going to be a fun 8 days or so. I've already given warning to my husband. But i'm hoping this will help. I'm just so tired of this.

Class, Cooking, and Coconut

Back to class today! I missed my somewhat odd human bio class :). My back held up pretty well, it's feeling a bit sore now but i'm heading to bed soon. I'm trying to get back into the groove of things, I was able to do a few chores around the house and bring Milo for a little walk before class. I'll try and keep up the tempo tomorrow, though I do feel like i'm catching a cold or something.

Bran made a really yummy stuffed chicken breast for dinner :) he's becoming quite the cook! I like trading off cooking dinner and dishes (one cooks, the other does dishes), I think it's working out well. I don't need to worry about having to make dinner late at night, Bran is learning to cook new things, and we are trading off doing one of our least favorite jobs (dishes) it's a win-win!

On the other hand, I think i'm sensitive to coconut. I've used coconut oil once before as a hair mask, but it ended up smelling really bad. 'Ok, the oil must have gone off' I though, so I had no worries about putting some relatively new, definitely clean smelling coconut oil on my face last night. After maybe an hour it started to smell. Ok, maybe it's releasing toxins? Or maybe my body chemistry just doesn't work with it? So I rinsed off as much as I could. This morning I woke up to slightly inflamed skin, new break outs and blotchy cheeks. Yeah, not liking it so much. I've also gotten a sore throat from eating raw deserts made with a lot of coconut oil. Apparently I don't learn very quickly >.>.

Quiet

Quiet day at home. I'm looking forward to going back to class tomorrow :). I've decided to try using coconut oil on my face. It's meant to help clear up all sorts of problems. The skin on my face feels quite nice. I'll see how it turns out tomorrow. My back is feeling back to it's normal level of pain, I was able to go on a walk but got quite fatigued after about 20 minutes.

I also made a banana cake. It turned out alright, though I think I like my better-banana-bread more.

Confusing, but OK

I've had a bit of an up and down day. Pain-wise i'm feeling just about back to my normal level of back pain (which is to say, annoying and not normal, but nor so horrific that I need to take narcotics). I'm not sure what helped in this...or if my body was just like 'eh, that was fun, back to normal now'. It's something i'll have to talk to my doctor about.

I was able to do my normal grocery shop with my lovely MiL, but I ended up getting an ocular migraine. It isn't so much fun having the world tip to either side and get fuzzy in patches. I only had a bit of a headache on the right side, it was more the visual disturbances. Not sure what triggered that. I've had more dairy than normal? My gut is telling me it's unhappy. I'm not sure why it's fine sometimes and unhappy other times. Crazy body.

So I was feeling unhappy at that point, but I was ok. The migraine subsided and Bran went out to see his friends and watch footy. I'm glad he wasn't watching it here ;). Nah, i'm happy he had his 'man time' out with his friends. I took this opportunity to mope around, watch an episode of glee, be more mopey, then finish a paining. There is something about painting, listing to music and singing like a scalded cat that is so cathartic XD. I now have another painting I can hang on our walls, started a new one, and felt much better for it. Then I cleaned the stove and watched a happy sappy movie.

So I end on a good note, feeling alright in body and mind. Milo is feeling much better too btw. His paw is still a bit pink but the inflammation is gone and the hair is growing back between his toes.

Break in the Storm

Feeling tired. Today my levels were significantly down, thankfully. I'm not sure why...the only differenced are that I laid down more yesterday and I actually took my panadol osteo at 6 am this morning. Whatever it is, i'm thankful. I had a nice chat with my counsellor as well. She called me rather than have me go in, as it's still difficult to walk. She thought it was good that I was able to make the connection between the childhood trama and my fears about getting worse. I'm thankful to have her as a resource. I'm hopeful that i'll be well enough to go back to school this week.

Revelations

I had a bit of a break down today. I woke up in a lot of pain and quite stiff. To the point where it took me an hour before I could kneel down and feed Milo. Even then, I ended up dropping his food and had to clean it up (while crying because it was so painful!).

I never wanted to end up at a point where I would need someone to help me with daily living tasks (bathing, feeding, using the toilet, etc,) but today I was almost there. I had trouble washing my hair yesterday, today I could barely clean myself. It's a hard thing to think about, i'm only 23! I don't want to have to have someone help me clean myself! It's bad enough that I need Bran to help out with so much else, but I will not ask him to help me take care of myself in that way. I never want to have to ask him to. I don't want to get to that point!

I don't know what i'm going to do if I get any worse...

I remember working as a nurse's aide, helping others with their daily living task. They were the elderly or the severely impaired. I had no problem helping them, but I am so sensitive about other people touching me. I think that's what it might come down to. I don't know if i've come out and said this, but I was sexually abused as a young child. It has impacted me in ways i'm still sorting through today, but i'm thinking this may be one of them. I don't want to lose control of my body ever again. It's beyond the embarrassment of having someone else clean me, I know they don't care what my body looks like. It's that I don't have control over my body. I'm figuring this out as i'm typing this, so sorry if it's a bit repetitive.

I think this is something i'll need to talk over with my counsellor.

Milo's paw is looking much better BTW.

Some Good News!

Another day at home.

But on a light note.......I GOT A TICKET TO SEE JOSH GROBAN!!!!!

I'm ridiculously excited about this :D. It's kept me happy through today, where I have experience some of the worst pain i've ever had. And this is while on endone! Milo's paw is looking much better. Also tomorrow has his work review. We are looking for it to be really good so he can ask for a raise :) I think he'll get it, it would be so helpful for us and he has worked so hard.

And I got a Josh Groban ticket. I have to wait almost two month! What agony ;)

Puppy Paws

I had another day at home today. Milo really needed to go to the vet as his paw was not looking good. We did go (after wrapping his paw in a sock and a plastic baggie) and he is to take antibiotics for three weeks. Poor thing :(. But he was happy enough to get out for a walk and get two extra spoons of peanut butter (with pills secretly hidden inside). We've both been resting for the rest of the day. I took my hard won endone, while it help with the pain only a little it does also make me foggy brained (and thus think about the pain less). I'm up to the therapeutic dose of amitriptyline now, so i'll give it a week or two and see how we go.

Likely i'll stay home and rest for the rest of the week, which means i'll be missing class :(. Not my favourite thing, as these classes are quite important, but I need to do what is best for me and sitting on those horrible chairs for three hours a day isn't doing me any favours.

We also found out that our neighbours (yes, the ones we've had problems with) have sold their unit! Good for them :) hopefully they move to a nice house away from here. Though I wonder what the new owners are like.

Being Thankful

Today was a not-so-much-fun day. I woke up with horrible back/sciatic pain. Really the worst i've had since I hurt my back working. Just aching, shooting, deep pain. Luckily, I already had a GP appointment. She was really great with everything, she think Lyrica will be the thing to help but I want to get up to the therapeutic dose of amitriptyline before I try anything else. She gave me some endone to get me through the worst days, with warnings not to get too attached. Which I wont. Because I hate the cloudy head feeling I get on anything heavier than 1 panadeine forte.

After a loooong travel back and a arduously slow hobble back to the apartment, I open up my new bag of trick to find that the pharmacist forgot the endone. W.T.F. After a hissy fit, I call them and of course there is a process to go through since it is a restricted drug (being a stronger opiate). After some time and a few calls the pharmacist says that he can't see on the security tape whether they did or did not give it to me, but as they know me he will drop it off at my apartment tonight. Really? Tonight? Yup. Returns my faith in humanity :). Thank you nice pharmacist. About an hour later I get my endone hand delivered to my door with apologies.

I'm so thankful to have people on my side, believing that i'm telling the truth. I'm so thankful to have people looking out for me :).

Milo, on the other hand, still had a sore paw. We are going to the vet tomorrow.

Puppies and Cakes

Milo's paw continues to look bad :( we are doing salt water soaks. If it's not looking at least a bit better tomorrow i'll bring him to the vet (who is luckily just down the road!). Now it's time for Downton Abbey :).

P.S. I made cupcakes :D I used this recipe that I found from Down to Earth. I also halved the sugar and used cream cheese frosting left over from valentines day (kept in the freezer). They came out quite lovely!

Again and Again

Still in a bit of pain, but much improved from yesterday. I was able to go shopping with only a little trouble. Milo's paw is still irritated, we've used a salt water bath on it to try and help it clear up. It's raining again.

Rough Stuff

It's been a rough day. I woke up thinking I heard Milo whimpering, so of course I sat straight up (scaring him in the process) hurting my back. He was fine, it was actually a bird calling that I heard. But here I was in a lot of pain.

Thankfully I already had an appointment with the osteopath, so after spending most of the day laying on the couch in horrible pain and doing the 20 minute (usually 10) walk down to their office I was offered some relief. Relief in the form of more pain as the osteopath pushed against knots in my back and manipulated bits and bobs, but goodness did it help! I feel about 70% better than I did this morning. Still not awesome, I wouldn't go for a long walk, but I might be able to manage grocery shopping tomorrow.

Milo has been licking one of his feet again. Just his back left, so I don't think it's an allergic reaction, but it's worrying none the less :( poor thing is a bit OCD about it. He is back to wearing a sock.

Upping amitriptyline to 60 mg.

Normal

Today was another meh day. Not much to really report on. My back has been stiff, I did take a panadol with codeine before class, and that helped with the evil chairs. I have an osteopath appointment tomorrow to see if that will help again. Had some more chicken and dumplings, mmmm...

Keep on Moving

Well...not as good of a day. Pain is a bit more up, maybe around a 5. Still alright, but I would prefer it to be lower. I couldn't get comfortable at any point during the three hour lecture, so there was a lot of squirming. Interesting lecture though, i'm really enjoying my classes :).

I have been feeling a bit down today. I'm not sure why. I didn't sleep very well last night so maybe that was it? I've also just upped the amitriptyline.

Heart of Hearts

So i've had another pretty good day :). Pain wasn't too bad, though still irritating down my R side. I was able to get through the class with the evil chairs with only some discomfort.

Now I may or may not be watching videos about how the heart circulates blood >.>...

Did I mention how thankful I am to be back in class?

I Do So Love Class

Today wasn't too bad of a day, despite it being rainy and a little cold. I got to wear my armwarmers that Bran got me for christmas <3, and I went to see my NP, who is always lovely. I hated having to tell him about going back on more pharmaceuticals, but he was understanding and we focused more on digestion. He is a kind person, so i'm always glad to see him.

On the other hand, I was late for class >.> but since I have a disability impact statement exactly for this reason (and I was walking around with my cane) my lecturer wasn't bothered (and took the time during break to catch me up :) ). I'm so thankful to go to a school with such kind lecturers. 

Pain wasn't too bad today, although for the past few days my ankles have been going out. So I used my cane to make sure I wouldn't trip. My R knee went out once and my feet keep falling asleep but otherwise I was alright. I need to make an appointment with the osteopath I was seeing before, but i'm hopeful things will start to even out soon. 

Oh, and no sign of the maggots. Thank The Gods!

Phobias

I. Hate. Maggots. I have this phobia of them. Can't be near them without anxiety attacks ensuing. We had a really bad summer as a kid where they got into EVERYTHING and since then I just can't stand them. When we were still at the many-keys house we had a few incidents and I had to call Bran home from work as I hyperventilated on the bed. Today, thankfully, they were just in a fly trap i've had set up for a few days. But the thought that I may wake up to the evil little things wiggling around on the floor has me in a slight panic. Really just wigs me out. Bah.

In other news, I haven't done much today. I need to get some prescriptions filled tomorrow. Aren't I interesting.

Maggots...and clowns. I hate clowns too.

Apple

Feeling a bit lonely tonight. Nerve pain still acting up. I wish I had a bath tub :/. Now i'm going to go eat an apple.

Bad Days...

Today has been a hard day. I woke up with pain, had a side dish of pain, and then it got worse.

I saw my rheumy today. He was quite pleasant, if not a bit useless...There really isn't anything he can do to help this time though. The pain i'm having is nerve pain related to my sciatic nerve and some issues around the L4-L5 disc in my back. So he is happy to write a referral to a pain specialist, but thats about it. Yoga, tai chi, water exercise. Thats once more what he says to do (along with the pain specialist). I'm already on amitriptyline, and my GP and rheumy both don't want to add anything heavier. I don't really wan't anything heavier either. They make me feel off or have anxiety attacks and don't help so much with pain so there isn't much of a point.

I was feeling really mad earlier, but now after having take my panadol with codeine and amitriptyline i'm feeling tired and zoned out.

And I have a bug bite on the bottom of my foot :(

Despondent

Oh dear single reader, it's been a roller coaster of a day. It started off a bit sore, then got better and better, then much worse...

So I had a pretty normal start to the day, sore and stiff. After some movement (and coffee) I was feeling pretty good. I made a nice room spray, did dishes, finished up some work for class, and took Milo for an extra long walk (being around 20 minutes as opposed to 10).

Then I had class, with the evil chairs. I'm not sure if it's the chairs or just that I overdid the walk, but my back and R leg have been off. I'm really concerned that the sciatic nerve is pinched again.

I'm off to see the rheumy tomorrow, so i'll see what he says.

I feel like i'm getting more frustrated with pain and the up and down thing. Maybe part of it is the amitriptyline being screwy, but I just would really like to not b in pain all the time. I feel like my patients is just gone. I don't want to accept that this is it, that i'm going to be in pain and tired all the time.

Biology and Alchemy

I'm getting more mouth sores lately...I may ask my rheumy (whom i'm seeing on friday) for a prescription for a daily dose folic acid instead of the twice weekly one I take...

In other news, third day of classes today! Had human bio 2, which was quite interesting. We are learning about blood, as mentioned, and today we talked about blood types, what makes a blood a specific type, Rh factor, and some diseases that have to do with blood. There was more than that, but it's a three hour lecture so i'm not going to get into all of it :). By the way, my lecturer is apparently an alchemist! How interesting! He had some fascinating ideas on how blood is where the spirit lives, and to make a strong medicine you need the spirit, body, and soul (alcohol, salt, oil) of the plant. It'll be interesting to get his take on things.

I wasn't awesome as far as pain goes. I did take a panadeine forte today as my back pain was not so much fun. I really hope the amitriptyline kicks in soon.

Also, Bran made pizza <3 I do so love my husband!

Semester Start

I had an alright day today :) it would have been good other than the pain down my right side was not so much fun. It's also been rainy and cold, so my hands are a bit sore. But my second class for this semester, Herbal Botany and Manufacturing, looks really interesting! Between that and Human Biology 2 i'm going to be so smart :P. I'll have to make sure to study plenty this semester, these are memory heavy classes.

Good Day :)

I had a good day today :). This is nice for a change! I had my first day of classes today, it's nice to get back into the swing of things. My class today was human biology two, we talked about blood. I'm looking forward to the rest of the semester, and to my class tomorrow which is herbal botany and manufacturing :D.

Pain-wise wasn't too bad either. My wrists and hands are a bit sore from the cool rainy weather, but the nerve pain down my right side has been a bit better today. It seems moving around and not sitting too long helps. Also all my meals were made for me today! Bran made some super yummy chicken and dumplings yesterday, and he cooked up the fish we had in the fridge today. He'll make a good home cook yet!

Shopping, Sick, and Sciatica

It's been a busy few days. Saturday I went grocery shopping, changed the tap handles (i'm so handy!) had a lovely meet-up with some pagan folk, and then was horribly sick around 10 pm. As in, projectile vomit sick. I'm not really sure why...

Feeling better today, though i'm having a lot of pain between my back and knee on the right side. After speaking with my counsellor on friday (who used to me a massage therapist) i'm thinking it may be nerve pain. Which is concerning, as I haven't done anything to cause any disc problems...

I've also had a meeting with most of the other owners in regards to some things that need to be done around our apartments.

First day of classes tomorrow :) i'm looking forward to it.

Meh

I've been feeling really down today. I'm not sure the reason exactly, if it's a mix of the methotrexate and the amitriptyline or  if i'm just heading down a dark alley.

On a lighter note, i've discovered pintrest. Look up Emma Winch and I should be around there somewhere.

And for the one person who seems to regularly read this, feel free to say hello! I'm happy to comment back if you have a blog.

My Valentine

Back is feeling a bit better :). Today was valentines day, so I made Bran some yummy cupcakes and meatball subs. Using chicken mince for the meatballs. Yum.

The cupcakes were originally going to be red velvet, using beet juice as dye, but I added a bit too much coco powder so they were basically just chocolate. Still quite yummy and I do so enjoy cream cheese frosting. Here is the original recipe. I did make some changes; I used less sugar, more coco power (and by default less flour), and used half a cup of sour cream (very thick) and half a cup of boiled and squeezed out beet water/juice. I think the color would have probably been fine if I hadn't added the extra coco powder. I used my usual recipe for cream cheese frosting.

I didn't make the flower on top, but i'm getting better at piping :).

My stomach is a bit twisty today...i'm not sure if it's all the sugar or if I caught something...

And Bran got me flowers <3 I do so love my husband!

Back to Pain.

Really painful back. Hitting a solid 6. Which is too bad, I had a nice walk with Milo today.

Pancake Day

I'm back to my normal level of pain. So I guess it was my body just being distracted by the new meds. I do find that for the most part i'm sleeping better, so hopefully that's from the TCA. My R knee was giving me grief today, but a bit of voltarin gell helped with that. I need to remember to get more of it...

On a lighter note, it is pancake day! Also known as mardi gras, shrove tuesday, and fat tuesday. Apparently in England (and less in Australia) it is pancake day. We had pancakes for dinner, despite that neither of us are christian or celebrate lent. Eh. Here is some info.

Good Day

Today was a pretty good day :). We got some chores done in the morning then went out for a high tea with my MiL and SiL in the city. It was quite yummy, with dainty little cakes and sandwiches, both Bran and I were so full that we didn't have dinner. Luckily we made sure to walk there and back, so we worked off a bit of that cake!

On that note, I was able to do a good bit of walking today without needing a rest. That is really good news compared to how I have been lately. My back still is sore, and my hands are perpetually sore, but it's much more manageable and I find that walking definitely helps my back to loosen up. I've also just upped the amitriptyline so we'll see how that goes tomorrow. So far I haven't really had any side effects from it but i've only been on 10 mg (20 mg tonight).

I've signed up for classes as well, really looking forward to getting back into it! Now I just need a good part time job and it'll be coming up roses!

Days Go Ever Ever on..

So remember how I was feeling much better? Well..i'm still feeling better, but closer to my normal level of pain. I know the amitriptyline can take a while to start working. It seems like maybe my body is already adjusting to the panadeine.

Feeling Mostly Better

Good news today, i'm actually feeling much better. I'm not sure if it's from the constant panadol or if the amitriptyline is working already or if my body is doing it's weird thing where it doesn't hurt for a week when I start a new med...but i'm thankful for being in less pain. I was able to walk to the nearby shops and back, which I haven't been able to do for quite a while :).

It's funny, i'm still in pain, but I can see just how much pain I was in before...I'm surprised I had waited that long before going to the doctor. I'm surprised I was able to do anything... But then again, it's hard to get out when you're in so much pain...

Lovely GP

I had a productive meeting with my GP today. As usual she was lovely, and quite concerned with my spike in pain levels. She agreed that trying the tricyclic antidepressants was a good idea, she actually has some other chronic pain patients on them so she knows that they can work well. She has also added 'round the clock panadol osteo (which is just a slow release panadol/acetaminophen) to my list of meds.

I took the amitriptyline a bit ago, and honestly i'm feeling a little bit speedy (not that i've taken speed before...just mind racy and that sort of thing) so....we'll see how I feel in another half hour. I'm hoping it will help...really really hoping.

I've also lost two kilos since my last visit! Yay! BP is also fine so...yeah...other than being diseased and symptom-ed and fat i'm pretty healthy ;)

Tomorrow, Tomorrow

A bit better emotionally today, but pain wise I have not been fairing well. My R hand and arm are quite sore as well as my back and feet.

On a lighter note I made a chicken pot pie (with Bran's help ;).

Seeing my GP tomorrow to talk about new meds to try. I'm not looking forward to the adjustment phase, but i'm hopeful that it'll help the pain and the depression i've run into.

Revisiting Old Ideas

I had a bit of a break down today. I was in a lot of pain and was just at the end of my rope. I've made the decision to try a tricyclic antidepressant to see if it'll help with both depression and the fibromyalgia pain. I feel bad for giving up on natural medicine, but i'm sure i'll come back to it at some point as I learn more myself and get to a place where i'm better able to deal with things.

Dreaming of Pie

I'm going to make a pot pie tomorrow.

Today was spent playing on my phone. Still in pain. Still tired. Really considering going back on antidepressants.

Going Down, Down...

Sore today again. My R hand and wrist got especially sore after attempting to chop up some meat for Milo's stew. I ended up getting really fatigued and sore when we were grocery shopping as well. I'm starting to be a bit concerned about this :/

Sick and Tired of Being...

Sick and tired. I had some dairy today and my intestines did not like it. R knee still playing up, as well as both feet at some points during the day. Seriously debating meds for fibro.

Thoughts

Another quiet day at home. I'm feeling a bit better emotionally, but i've been quite sore. Especially my R hip and knee.

On a different note, i'm seriously considering taking an animal naturopathy course after i'm finished my degree. I've found some courses in VIC and NSW that look promising. I would like to be able to combine my love of helping with herbs, and my love of animals :).

Also i'm looking forward to when I actually get to have the operation on my knee, because it really hurts!

Blah

Feeling tired and a bit sad. No particular reason I think...although I have a theory that having a lot of sugar yesterday maybe has something to do with it. Hip/back pain on the right side is not so nice, and my right wrist and hand are a bit sore. Blah

Days of Rain

It continues to rain, but we had a respite for most of the day off and on. Milo was able to get out for a much needed walk. I was able to get some laundry done for the upcoming week. Bran ate soup :). I'm still feeling very tired, but I haven't taken any supplements or medicines for the past two days so that may be effecting me. I had a nap again despite having a decent nights sleep. I do enjoy the quiet days at home with my little family :).

Short Stack

Quiet day at home. It's been storming.
We've had some floods in the area.
I'm thankful we are safe here.
Bran is feeling sick.
I made cookies.

Tramadol Trouble

I had a not very nice time last night :(. I was in a lot of pain after carrying around a little lost dog (who is safely back home) so I decided to take some pain killers. Tramadol.

About an hour after I had taken it I woke up with a pounding heart, nausea, and high anxiety. I tried to go back to sleep but really couldn't and I was worried I was having an adverse reaction, so I asked Bran to stay up with me while I waited it out. He, of course, stayed up with me and would until I was alright. Honestly, I wanted him to stay up incase I stopped breathing. I hadn't actually taken very much, 100 mg, but I had also has a voltarin and a panadeine forte earlier in the day, so maybe it mixed somehow? After about an hour and a half I was through the anxiety attack and falling asleep, so we wen't back to bed. I still ended up waking up  with a pounding heart over the course of another hour and a half every time I started to fall asleep, but it calmed down quickly. Not so much fun. I felt very sick today as well. I barely moved from the couch and needed Bran to help take care of me. I'm feeling mostly better now, after having taken a few naps through out the day.

So lesson learned. Tramadol does not agree with me and i'll need to find an alternative. I don't want to go through such a scary situation again. Also I was/am still sore :( so it didn't really help so much...

Housesitting

I've been away for a few days, I bet the 1-2 of you who read this missed me ;). The truth is that my husband, pup, and I have been housesitting for my MiL as she went down to Sydney for an interview about the book she's written. I'll write more on that when it's available. It's been a nice few days over there, being able to take a bath and wriggle the wrinkly skin of her shar pei Cimba (who is a 12 year old rescue dog whom she adopted last year <3). Milo had fun having another dog around and being able to walk around his old stomping ground.

But now it's nice to be home. It's nice to have my ingredients for cooking, my bed, my pots and pans...

I did have two days over there were I was feeling very low. I'm not sure if it was just changing things around so much, or the increase in st. john's wart, but it wasn't very nice. I've bounced back though, and i'm feeling much better. Pain wise I haven't been too bad, my back was very sore for a day, but it's gotten better. I've continued to use the tennis ball to help with tight muscles in my back as well as adding in magnesium. I think it's been helping with the generalised muscle pains. I need to find an acupuncturist to try next as I think the one I went to before had shut up shop for the time being.

Maybe Wheat Sensitive?

Remember those mini-hamburgers I made yesterday? Well...I think i'm reacting to the gluten in them. Either that or i'm going to end up with gastroenteritis again (although i'm pretty sure they were cooked through...) I had a very bloated feeling all day, with little spasms of pain. I only really felt hungry this evening. Blah, we'll see what tomorrow brings...

I don't want to be sensitive to wheat :( I love making bread. It isn't even baking in general, it's working with the bread dough, the feel and the smell of the yeast mixing with the wheat flour and the elasticity of the gluten forming bonds... From my experience, it can't be recreated in a gluten free bread. While some gluten free breads are tasty, they seem more like a batter to work with. This makes me feel a little sad.

Burgers and Resumes

So sometimes I actually like to write about relevant things...but that time is not today.

I continue being tired. I was able, though, to get out and hand in my resume to a health shop down the road. Alas, they weren't looking to hire anyone. I also visited the "vampires" today to get my monthly blood tests done. Always fun to have an aching arm for a few days >.>.

I also made chicken burgers for dinner. Mini ones :). They came out alright, but I think I would only use half an onion next time and grate it. But i'm someone who doesn't like big chunks of onion. They were a big hit with the hubby ;).

Hip wasn't too bad today. I did have a horrible cramp in my calf that started Milo with my yelling...and my R knee has been wonky....but other than that not too bad pain wise!

Portobello Almost-Pizza

I really want pizza :/.

I tried to make pizza using a portobello mushroom, pasta sauce, and cheddar but it just wasn't the same (although it was tasty!)

Still feeling tired today, but a bit better than yesterday. I had every intention of going to Nundah and handing the owner of the health shop my resume, but alas, Milo's spray collar was out of batteries. Still better I discovered it now rather than when I had an appointment or something.

Hip was still sore, but the tennis ball thing helped again.

I was also feeling a bit irritated and restless today. I'm not sure if it's just because i've been stuck in the house, increasing the st. john's wart, or just from being tired...not my favorite though.

And some good news, I got a distinction in human bio 1 :D thats a good grade!

Pity Party

I was very tired today. Tired and in a lot of pain from my R hip. I spent almost the entire day on the couch. It's days like this that make me worry I wont be able to do very much with my life. I'm only 23, and already i'm restricted on how much I can work, what kind of work I do, how far I can walk, how much I can accomplish in a day, my immune system is lowered, and of course lets not forget the pain.

So I did have a bit of a pity party.

After that, I got on the floor and stretched. I used a tennis ball and rolled around with it under my hip. It was painful, but it helped release the muscle. Bran was very sweet and made dinner. I'm thankful to have him :).

Soup Loop

I had a quiet day at home. Not too much to report on. I've been feeling tired all day, maybe lack of coffee? The green tea I got isn't very nice :(. I made some soup with the chicken stock I made from yesterday's chicken. It came out alright, but I feel like i'm not very good at seasoning soup :/ it's often bland even when I use nice ingredients and stock. My hip is still out of whack, it feels like the muscles are all seized up and weak. I'll have to go see the osteopath again soon I think.

Visit with the NP

I had a nice meeting with my Naturopath today. We've decided that it might be a good idea to up my romotiv (it's a mix of hops and st.john's wort mostly) and add in the magnesium powder to see if it will help with pain and muscle problems. Other than that keep steady with cutting out gluten, sugar, and dairy. Fun stuff.

I cooked a chicken. It didn't end up being raw this time ;).

Short Stack

Day spent at home.
Doing a bit of cleaning.
Morning abdomen cramps.
Made fish for lunch, it turned out well!
Nachos for dinner.
X2, good movie :)
Sleepy time.

Funny Little Pub

Today was a pretty usual saturday. Cleaning, grocery shopping, resting. Although we also went out for a birthday ;). A good friend of ours had a birthday party out at a funny little pub/restaurant in the valley. Of course it was nice to catch up with people, but the pub was the main event for me. They had blue drinks! Not gross blue daiquiris  but electric blue things with a pineapple slice :D! They also had brightly coloured fruity looking drinks and one in a pineapple! Alas, I didn't want to put more stress on my poor liver so I did not indulge in any of these drinks, but now I know where to find them ;).

Pain levels were up and down today. Woke up feeling groggy and tired. I think it was the cheese. I also had normal milk with my coffee, and almost immediately felt my gut gurgling. Really not liking dairy it seems. Within the past few hours the tendons in my feet have become inflamed. I don't know if thats related but it's worth noting.

Long Day is Long

Looong day.

I had my deferred human bio final today. Well....if I hadn't already passed the class I would be concerned...but as I did i'm not going to be too worried about it. I know I did really well on a quarter of it...>.>...

I also had a migraine...all...day...It was only really bad on my way home, but man is it ever hanging in there.

On top of that i've had an MTX hangover and Bran has a stomach bug :(.

Now i'm going to go have a luke warm shower (since the cold water pipes aren't actually cold) and pass out.

Coconut Flour Muffins

Spent most of the day studying and doing a few house chores. Also brought Milo to the vet for his vaccines.

Now for something more interesting; I made some GF coconut flour muffins! The recipe I used is from Heavenly Homemakers. Mine didn't end up looking quite as lovely, but they are yummy! They may be a bit sweet and a bit oily though, so next time I make them i'll play with the recipe a bit. I was quite surprised at how much the coconut flour soaked up, also that it wasn't too eggy. I did use my lovely new electric beaters, so it came together in a flash :D I found that you would probably have to do a lot of mixing to get all the lumps out, so that something to keep in mind.

So Many....

Studying for my exam on friday. Why are there so many words?!?

Sleepy Time Soon?

Today I took Milo for a little walk. Then I went to the store. When I got home I made dinner. After dinner I did dishes. Now i'm considering skipping a shower (despite it getting into the 90's today) and going to bed. I'm just feeling so tired after just doing a few things. I didn't even study today for my final on friday! Which I may still squeeze in...It's amazing how tired I get after only doing a few little things.

In other news, my R knee really flipped out today. As in shouting from pain. I'm wondering if the doctors aren't so correct and the little bit floating around in there are getting caught under the knee cap. Either way not so much fun. I'm thinking tonight might be a good panadol with codeine night. Maybe with some diclofenac thrown in for good measure.

Ugh. I really need to meet people.

Elimination Diet Day 1

So today was fine. As i've mentioned, i'm not cutting out a whole lot of stuff yet. I did have a little bit of cheese, which tends not to bother me, but I think i'll really need to cut out all dairy. I'm not going to be too hard on myself though because I know i'll just want to stop. I have stayed gluten free though, and found some interesting recipes using coconut flour that i'm going to try after I get the chance to get some coconut oil.

We also got our couch cushions replaced today. O.M.Gs! What a difference that has made! We previously had cushions that had springs under a bit of foam. The springs ended up going every which way within 3 years >.< and this isn't a cheapy little couch either. So finally we had the cushions replaced by a local re-upholstery man. He did a great job and used good quality foam which is guaranteed for 7 years. He was late, which I don't like, but he was polite and gave Milo a pat. Plus he said if the foam was too hard then he would be happy to replace it with softer foam. It's that kind of thing I appreciate :). Plus he got it done all in one day! I've already noticed that my hip doesn't hurt as much :) very nice.

Pre-Elimination Diet

I did not sleep very well last night. Didn't get to sleep until 2 am x.x. Other than that i've had a pretty good day! Kind of. I also had some pretty bothersome pain in my R hip and R foot. The hip pain lessened after a walk, but of course the foot pain is tendon related and was less happy about the walk.

Bran and I also watched the documentary Forks over Knives. It was mostly information I knew, but interesting to watch anyway. Very pro-vegan.

Tomorrow starts my elimination diet! No dairy, wheat, refined sugar, and cutting down soy. More whole foods, cutting out processed foods. I think there was something else I was going to cut out but I forgot now o.O. If I don't notice a difference in a month or so i'll try cutting out something else such as nightshades...or something....Yay! Go me! >.> did I mention i'm pretty tired?

French Onion Soup

Still sick, but a bit better today. Stil tired, but I was able to get out and do some grocery shopping with the MiL. I'm so thankful that she comes all the way over here to see us and give me a take me shopping :).

I also made some french onion soup using this recipe from Smitten Kitchen. I wiggled the ingredients around a little bit, but generally stayed true to the recipe. It turned out wonderfully of course and even Bran ate it! He hates soup! But loves cheese and bread ;). He said he would even eat other soups! This may the the start of something :D. He's really been very sweet while i've had this cold. I'm so thankful for such a kind husband :).

Pain-wise, my left ankle and left knee have been unhappy today. Which is odd, usually it's the right side. I also woke up with stomach pain and reacted badly to milk today. I'm set to start an elimination diet on monday.

Sick

Ugh. Sick. Blah. Nose is both stuffy and running. But mostly i'm just very very tired.

Quiet

Quiet day at home
I caught Bran's cold :(
Love the smell of laundry,
That had dried in the sun.
Wish I had a bathtub.
Sore shoulders.

2012 Recap

Happy New Year :)

A warm welcome to 2013

Not the end of the world yet.

Looking back over 2012, i've had a lot of ups and downs. I've learned what it is like to cope with slowly increasing disability. I've dealt with more people in person and on the phone than I ever really want to in a year. I've been lonely both alone and surrounded by people. I've been afraid of losing Milo, and felt anger at injustice. I've gained weight.

We've become home owners. I've met some wonderfully interesting people. I've learned of my interest in biology. I've experienced both pharmaceuticals and natural medicines which will help me in my career. I've seen the smiles of my family on a saturday morning. I've grown my own herbs, and i'm learning how to grow more. I've continued to do well in my studies. I've found things that work and stopped things that don't work in regards to PsA and fibro. I've watched people look forward to and enjoy my cooking. I've made a Thanksgiving feast. I've held a job, at least for a while.

And so much more.

Now comes 2013. This is the year I am going to try a very strict dietary change to see if it will help my diseases. I will continue to try new holistic practices to help in dealing with pain. I'll get a gosh darn job! And i'll work to integrate myself with a community.

Welcome 2013